Trying really hard not to panic...

O.K. I figure I have been pretty good at not being a panic hound when it comes to my Daughter. We have dealt with issues with her in her 12 short months of her life, her tongue, her many ear infections, bumps and bruises, but last night someone said something about her and I have been seriously trying to hold my self together. It is nothing I am sure, correctable if it indeed turns into an issue. I have tried to be a laid back Mom, not freaking out over every piece of dirt, grass, dog hair, rock, bird seed she puts in her mouth. Figure the more she eats the better her immune system will be, you know, just going with the flow. Well, (I know get to the point) last night my neighbor (which I love dearly) said, "I am surprised her Dr. does not have you do something for her pigeon toes." WHAT?! She continues telling me that her niece was pigeon toed and they had to put her in hard soled high top shoes while she slept. That during sleep their feet are relaxed and the shoes will correct the problem. I think I had my first moment of "Don't pick on my child!", and "What the fuck did I do to her?" Mind you we have since discovered that she has some issues that come along with a cleft pallet,but she does not have one, I know that sounds very confusing, to me too but they assure me that she is fine, hell she is growing and thriving so it must not be an issue right?

So, I figure, well what does she really know? (Just has 4 kids of her own, mind you) I figure I will ask her teachers at school, they deal with children of this age all day. So, I ask today, "Do you think Sydney has issues with being pigeon toed?" Yes, they have noticed and also wondered why the Dr. has not said anything.....OK, so I wait, wait until 9:30 am to call the Dr.s' office to get her in, so we can see if this really is an issue. WHY DOES THIS BOTHER ME SO MUCH? I can feel the panic in my chest, it is about to come out and I just want to run and grab Syd and just hold her. It is not a big deal, I know, I know but it is to me, why is something wrong with my baby. She is perfect to me, why can't everyone else see this? Fuck this is hard, I know I am making more of an issue than it really is, but it really bothers me.


At 7:54 AM , Blogger Kim said...

Oh Tawny, I can't believe they said this to you. I am sorry. I would think that Dr. Julie would've noticed and said something if it was an issue.

It is hard because she is yours and someone said something about her. Regardless of what it is, you probably will always feel defensive, which is normal. The doctors here told me Little Man was orange at his first appt and I was hurt.......and looking back at pictures, he was, but it still hurt me when they said it.

Please post after you see the doctor or call me if you need to.

At 8:27 AM , Blogger TL said...

Thanks Kim! She goes at 11:45 with Daddy. I am still upset, spoke with the receptionist. I told her I would think that Dr. T would notice, but then I keep thinking we all were just in awe in how she was acting seeing that earlier that day she had had surgery and maybe this was something that we overlooked. I have so many damn theories at this point. Once Scott is done with the appointment and I know somehthing I will let you know ASAP, not like her legs are going to fall off, but well, I feel that way...

Don't worry, people tell me how yellow she looked in her baby pictures, one person said "No offense but she looks Mexican." OK, yes she was yellow(OK VERY yellow), and no offense taken, but wow, it sure hits you right in the freaking heart!


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