Let the planning begin

Yesterday I made my weekend Wal-Mart run. While I was there I had to pick up a few things for Sydney and her 1st birthday. I found this. I cannot tell you how excited I am to use this sucker. I don't know if she or I love bubbles more. I am planning on taking it to her school on her birthday so all the little ones can play in the myriad of bubbles. I have to say her being the age she is, shopping for her birthday and Christmas was not that hard because you could put her presents right in the cart and she had not a freaking clue what I was doing. I know next year I will have to do shopping without said child.

I never made the "formal" birthday annoucements that I planned on. I did it the cheap way, I did the Evite. I feel like a shit for doing it this way, but Mommy was in crisis mode and could not pull her shit together to get them out in time. Truth being, if you don't make them, they still get older you just look like the shitty parent. At least she will not remember that I did not do this. She is born in the computer age, so it is only right that her birthday invites go out via e-mail. Yeah right keep telling yourself that!!

What will we be doing for the big day? Well, besides eating cake, I have no clue. I wanted to grill out, but we are under a burn ban for the state, no grilling allowed so it might be pizza. In all likelihood I will go to Costco, buy the plethora of appetizer's that they offer in the frozen food area and heat that up. I did not invite any children to this party, like 1 yr olds are going to care or want to be at this party, the 1st birthday is always for the parents anyway!! Hopefully the people who do have kids will bring them with but not many of them live around us. So, Syd will be sitting back with her Daddy's friends sipping some Bud Light and having a grand time eating cake. Probably will be the extent of the celebration, oh and the bubble machine.

This weekend was so out of sorts. It started on Friday right before 5 I got a call, we have an offer on the house. Our realtor called me and it rolled right to my voice mail, that really pisses me off. Never mind that all freaking day on Friday 5 out of the 7 phone lines for my work were down. We also lost the fax, and DSL line, seems that some shit head decided to vandalize the phone lines in the area and 1200 people were without phone service. I did the best I could with forwarding the lines to the open ones but the business for the day really fell to an extremely low level. Even with all that I did, some of the calls never got through. Plus, my boss was out of town and whatever I did was not the totally right thing to do in the situation. I had just about had it by the end of the day and there was really nothing else I could do, I am not nor will I ever claim to be Verizon.

Anyway, offer on house, translation, they want us the seller to give them, the buyer everything. I guess they are so new to the situation that the concept of us "making money" on the deal escaped them. I was told not to freak a lot of people low ball on the first offer. Scott and I sat down and came up with what we thought was fair on a counter. We called our realtor, he and I talked. He asked if I wanted to hear his suggested offer, I did of course. I mean, hell this is his job and all and I have never sold a freaking house. His offer was much more hard nosed than the one that Scott and I had come up with. I told him, well, I like what you are proposing here so go with that. Never telling him what we had discussed ourselves. Hell, let him do the work he is getting paid to do it.

We have not heard back from our counter offer. I was also told that another individual was interested in the house on Friday too. No formal offer came over but a number was stated. The same counter was sent to him as well. We did have 3 2nd showings this weekend too, so hopefully we will have a solid offer that everyone can live with from someone soon. I also informed the realtor that there is to be no showings on the 4th of February since that is the day we will be celebrating Sydney's birthday. We have never told someone no about a showing so I do not feel bad about this. Even the fuckers that wanted to see the house last night between 6-7 PM...dinner had to be made people... Thankfully, I made my chili at my parents house 1 mile away and took it home when the showing was over.

I know, your just dying to know, are you better? Am I still in crying jags about Syd turning 1. Today no. I saw the Dr. on Thursday about my meds, keeping me under close supervision and I am thankful for that. We have upped the one again, seeing that I have lost one of the 13 pounds I have gained. He states that the weight should not just keep coming on and that my body should stabilize. So we cranked the dose back up by 1/2 again. I have to say I am thankful for that, I was getting anxious again and I was not liking the feeling because I had been without it. Mind you when I don't feel anxious it is like I have lost something. But well, me being that way is not best for me or my family. I have upped the dose and I feel better and I am not eating like there is no end like before. I hope things just remain on an even keel and I can have somewhat of a normal life. ha-ha! I go back in 6 more weeks for a weight check just to keep things on record in case something strange happens. I am still working with Wanda on re-directing my thoughts in not jumping to the worst case senario each freaking time to freak my shit out. It is a chore and sometimes I am exhausted in fighting with myself.

Sometimes does it just seem like I am so totally fucked in the head?! I feel it at times.

Saturday-

Saturday, Scott and I had a much needed adult night. We went for sushi, I am now officially addicted to sushi. This stuff is freaking amazing. The flavors you get when mixing the different food combinations. Now, I guess someone could get pretty picky with me, I do not eat raw seafood. Sorry, I have tried it, tuna and very very very rare tuna, the consistency is not to my liking. But sushi with tempura shrimp, scallops, and soft shell crab wow, the bomb! Crawfish with spicy sauce, wonderful. It was great. Scott told me to pick where we were to eat. I just knew he was never going to let me pick again. He was a bit reluctant, but after I explained that it was going to be really good and to trust me, he did great. We ordered WAY too much, but it all was great, he admitted it was better than he thought and even said he would eat it again. One thing I loved about the night out, the meal took forever to prepare and we had a lot of time to just talk, no television or other things to distract us. It was good for both of us. Times like that I am able to look back and see what hell I have put my spouse through this year and how thankful I am to have someone as strong as him to stand by me and help me at my lowest point. He says I am strong, but in the strength I show it comes from the strength he gives me through his love.

After sushi, we went to Barnes and Noble and got a few books for Syd's birthday. I love the markdown table when you find an author you read and the hard cover is less than $ 6.00, what a bonus day for me!! We got coffee and shared a dessert, it was a great night.